Fated
by EralisseGrace
Summary: Being a career is supposed to be fun. Right? Growing up in District 2 "careers" are indoctrinated to believe this without question, to become lethal machines, to win the games. At least this is what the rest of Panem sees them as, but this description all that accurate?
1. Prologue

Hey FF community,

First off I would like to say thank you for taking the time to come and read through my first story on here. I am very new to this but want to put material up if a decent quality, that being said I am always open to reviews/comments/concerns to improve the content of this site and provide a better experience for everyone. I hope you all enjoy my first story, I have a few others in the works and may post the beginnings of those at some point as well.

Happy Reading Everyone (and please let me know what you all think (good or bad!) in the reviews,

EralissëGrace

Being a career is supposed to be fun. Right? Wrong. Dead wrong. Its necessary because of where I live but it's not fun. Living in District 2 I volunteered as a tribute when I was nine, as per the norm, but I offered up myself not only to keep my family fed but to keep my little sister out of the games. In Panem the government has an annual competition where two teenagers are chosen from each of the 12 districts to fight to the death with only one emerging victor. It supposedly wasn't always like this though at least not until District 13 rebelled. They were stupid and ill equipped so the peacekeepers quickly squashed them, and in return we are reminded every year who we owe everything to. The Hunger Games are our District's way to prove how we deserve the favors of the Capitol as we can and do bring pride to our district by winning regularly, every family is required to do their part. These are the reasons why I am now a tribute in training for the 73rd Hunger Games.

The morning sun came much earlier than I would have liked. Today was the day I was to leave my little room on the floor my family occupied to travel to the center of the city and enter the training facilities for the first time. I kept reminding myself how I was helping my family and how my volunteering would provide tessere for them, as well as keep my sister from being thrown into this chaos. I was still staring at the ceiling when my mother walked in, I could see it out of the corner of my eyes she knew too, the way her shoulders were slumped. We had a pretty good relationship, nothing overly affectionate, just an understanding of each other and the way things had to be. I knew there wasn't a reason to delay the inevitable, that a trainer would be at my house shortly to collect me on their trip down to the capital and I slid off my bed, my bare feet hitting the cold tiled floor effectively waking me up the rest of the way. "Morning mom". I said looking up at her. She looked tired and like she had been crying. I knew she probably was, she never became a tribute as her older brother volunteered for her family, and so she never had to learn to control her emotions and expressions, something I had already been schooled in. "It'll be okay mom". I murmured in hopes she'd understand I was okay with this, or I was trying to be.

"I know sweetheart. I know." She pulled me up into a hug and I remember letting myself cry just one tear at the thought this would be the last hug I got, probably for a long time. "Come on we got to get some food in you. The trainer will be here soon and we wouldn't want you to leave without breakfast." She smiled and I nodded. Hoping she wouldn't see the faint traces of the path that tear left on my small cheek. "Change into your clothes and I'll have something ready when you're changed" and with a click of my door she was gone and I was alone again. Alone was something I used to cherish, that is before I became a career, before everything happened. I relished the quiet times when my brain could work uninterrupted. Now I realize just how much things have changed even if I didn't understand that then.

My family wasn't overly wealthy by any standard and living on the bare necessities was commonplace for us, so once I had pulled on my clothes which consisted of worn leggings and a plain pullover shirt, I was surprised when I walked into the hallway leading to our kitchen and smelled cinnamon. Greeting me was my mom holding a generous bowl of cinnamon oatmeal and a tall glass of milk. I couldn't remember the last time we had something other than plain oatmeal made with hot water and a slice of bread, if we were lucky. Everyone from my family was already seated at the small table, my dad and sister already tucking into their own bowls of oatmeal and for some reason seeing this made me happier than any amount of food could.

I barely had time to finish my small bowl of oatmeal before there was a heavy knock on the door. My mom hadn't even opened it up yet and I knew who it was, the trainer was here already and before I could really process what was happening I was being ushered out. I didn't look back, if I had I would have seen my frail mother clutching her sweater around her waist, tears slipping off her chin, I'm glad I didn't. As soon as the door closed an iron fist was clamped around my upper arm dragging me to the street. I didn't bother resisting, but that apparently didn't matter to the trainer as the hand stayed where it was to the point where I had begun to feel my pulse in my fingers. Only once we reached the transport did my arm get released and as another person in a similar fitted jumpsuit opened the door I was shoved soundlessly inside. Stumbling up the steps I made sure to straighten as quick as I could before taking in my new surroundings. The transport wasn't full by any means, only two other kids who looked about my age were on it. A small girl with shoulder cropped brown hair sat at the end of the one down bench seat and a lean guy with a stone cold exterior and pale blonde hair to match his icy persona on the other end, leaving me no choice but to sit myself between the two of them. Damn. Given the other seats not being pulled down I didn't really have a choice either. Keeping my back rigid and feet together I looked straight ahead and the three of us remained quiet the entire ride to the training facility.

Suddenly the doors slid open revealing a man who was clearly the superior to the other men we had previously seen, his hair slicked back and a gruesome scar stretching from his left temple to his chin. "Cheer up kiddies!" He said sarcastically, "You're gonna be heros" and he turned finishing his proclamation with a malicious smirk as he sauntered off onto the platform. Turning my head I glanced out the windows, it didn't seem much like a hero's welcome to me. Just a line of more transports arriving and then others unloading more kids with expressions whom I guessed matched mine. The guard who collected us stepped up to me and grabbed my arm again, his other hand grabbing the arm of the boy who rode with us. The second guard grabbed the girl's arm and we proceeded to the large glass paned building in front of us where we were ushered to points that looked like information centers. I came to discover they weren't though. They were check-in points, where the guards gave information on the kids they had brought from the transports. The guards who were insistent on keeping an iron fist on our arms shoved us forward when it was our turn. The other girl was roughly nudged forward her eyes remaining downcast, the guard gruffly announced,

"Clove Merriman, second daughter of Suzanne and Shane Merriman, third ring".

The man holding my arm then shoved me forward much like his counterpart had done to Clove. I kept my eyes up and looked directly at the stoic man recording our information. "Rachel Wilkins, eldest daughter of Diane and John Wilkins, third ring". Then he shoved the boy forward and similar to how I reacted he kept his chin up, a defiant look in his eyes. "Cato Hadley, third son of Julliane and Stephan Hadley, third ring". Up close his eyes held more ice than they did on the train, an almost knowing look about his features. _Then again he has two older brothers. But, doesn't only oldest usually get sent?_ My thoughts were interrupted as upon the completion of our check-in the guard shoved Cato and I in front of him again and began marching us towards yet another room. Clove was towed behind us, looking much like a rag doll with her limp posture. "You go in there" the guard gestured to Cato with a nod of his head towards the door to our right. "N' you girls go in that room" Clove and I were directed towards the door on the left. I numbly walked to the handle and pulled it open, not giving the acknowledgment to the guard that I had heard him, since he didn't seem to care if I did or didn't.

Inside was a table, behind which three girls in red stood. Piles of identical black, grey, and red jumpsuits were stacked up, but that wasn't the most intimidating thing. In the front of the room stood an older lady who was anything but what her frail body begged you to believe. Even at nine I could tell she could kill me right here and now, probably not even blinking an eye at it, and I wouldn't even put up a fight in trying to stop her. Her silver streaked hair slicked back into a tight functional bun gave her head an even sharper look than her immensely pointed nose already did, but when she talked was when I was fully intimidated. A voice which didn't match her body barked out for us to strip down to our undergarments and put on the jumpsuits assigned. Neither of us even thought of doing otherwise and immediately complied. I murmured a thank you to the girl who handed me mine and a sharp crack was felt across my shoulders, forcing me to drop my jumpsuit and catch myself by grabbing the table in front of me. Apparently I gasped in pain or maybe shock I don't know but I felt another lash and the slow trail of blood drops, the result of the whip held by the esteemed sergeant as I had so sarcastically dubbed her.

"You are not ever to speak, much less, thank an avox for anything. You are a tribute representing your district its best you start acting like one. Secondly, we do not show weakness by crying out in pain. It is something anyone and everyone will not hesitate to exploit. Consider yourself let off easy for this one." She tightened her thin lips into an almost flat line and proceeded to order me to get my jumpsuit on and get into the orientation room. It was here that I fully realized how I was going to be trained to act, it was also here that I promised myself I wouldn't lose sight of who I was before I stepped foot in the orientation center.


	2. Chapter 1

We grew up this way. Struggling to both prove ourselves and once we knew the difference, not lose ourselves in the process. Often I found myself sitting on my bed during one of my rare visits home thinking about how it had come to this point. All the training courses, weapons, and survival skills I had learned since I entered the training facility when I was nine. My situation was no different than the other tributes in training, we all were stuck in the same ruts we were in eight years ago. Tonight I was due back in the training center by 1900 sharp, being that it was already 1700 I began throwing my meager belongings into my knapsack. The run to the training facility should take me close to 40 minutes and if I leave now I should be out of the house before my father gets home from his shift. We've never had the best relationship and frankly I find it easier to avoid him than listen to his rants on how poor of a life we have or how my mother doesn't do enough. However, just as I'm pulling on my training shoes and black tribute jacket I hear the door open, I should have expected it with the luck I generally had. "Shit" I mumble. The door opening only meant that my father was home and that never ended well. Especially since he was home from work about an hour early and he had probably already began with the spirits. I thought about dropping out my window but I learned with a broken arm from a previous attempt that it wouldn't end well, plus I couldn't leave without saying bye to my mom and sister since I didn't know when I'd be let go again. They sky was beginning to darken and I knew I needed to go to avoid the unpleasantries of being late, but that didn't make me want to face the other unpleasantry waiting me downstairs. In fact a part of me would almost rather face a pissed off instructor over my father. I took in a deep breath, counted to ten and let it out. Gathering up my nerves I headed out into the hall.

I slipped into my sister's room on my way to the kitchen to begin with my goodbyes. She was curled on her bed, a pillow hugged to chest and wet cheeks from crying. She was too innocent for this world we lived in. I went out of my way to shelter her from the horrors of the real world, worker my ass off in training for the rewards of extra tessere to keep her out of that center. "Sarah?" I asked sitting on the edge of the bed.

"Why do you have to go?" She asked, picking her head up to look at me.

"Because that's just how things are Sar. You know I have to go. But I'll be back. I always come back." I smiled at her when she gave me a look of disapproval, fresh tears on the brink of spilling over.

"I know. You always come back just like you promised you would. I just don't want you to go."

"Believe me, I don't either. But I have to go now. You keep the family together okay? Do your chores and be nice to mom. Don't forget your schoolwork."

"Okay" she sniffled and wrapped her arms around me. I squeezed her back before setting her back on her bed.

"No more tears. Kay?" I asked as I wiped away some hair stuck to her face back. She nodded and smiling I left her room to make my way to the kitchen.

He was sitting at the table with a cup of coffee in his hands, something that annoyed me to no end was his lack of concern for our supplies, it seemed like he used without understanding how little we had at times. There was one time my mother did call him out on it but he only yelled at her and went on sipping his luxury drink. No point in me bringing it up again tonight after all my goal was to get out of the house with little altercations. My mother was standing by the counter reading something the the local newspaper and I made my way over to her saying my goodbyes. I pointedly ignored my dad until I was almost to the door and only then did I mumble a quick bye dad before it clicked closed.

One look at the sky told me I was later than I wanted to be. Again. Shit. I'd have to make it there in exactly 40 minutes so my run wouldn't be an easy one. At this moment I realized I had a partner in my run, my long time friend Cato Valdis, the frigid boy from the train my first day of training. Since that day we had both grown and finding more common ground between us, became friends. Of course we kept it very minimal at the training center because the officers often used that against trainees. We weren't encouraged to become anything but cold hearted machines to bring glory to our district. Cato and I, we had our act down. To everyone else we were the best of the best, but when it was just us we let our masks slip just a bit, and it seemed as if I wasn't the only one who was leaving late. "Hey" I breathed not breaking stride.

"Hey yourself" he countered and he flashed his trademark Cheshire grin, known to make quite a few girls weak. He had grown up extremely well. From that scrawny blonde kid who seemed angry at the world he had changed quite a bit and was now a wall of muscle and calm power. His grey blue eyes possessed more strength than most of our fellow trainees did in their entire bodies and he knew how to use every one of skills to get what he wanted. Or that's what he wanted everyone to think. Cato didn't really want half of what he got, but he had a facade to keep up. We had a facade to keep up.

We were both just turning seventeen and were on the track to volunteer this year, a little known fact to anyone except us and legally we weren't even supposed to know about each other's contracts but we did naturally. To those who were smarter than the collection of rocks making up the asphalt disappearing beneath my go-fasters anyone could tell we were the ones picked - of course they had backups who also had their training regimens increased but within the past month our training had increased threefold and our bodies showed it. I could feel the tinges of shin splints in my lower legs and knew my blisters on my hands would be ripping off soon, effects of the trade they called it. I understood. I didn't question things and did as I was told the first time and quickly. Partially why I had succeeded as well as I had was because I didn't draw the grueling attention of the instructors to myself, something which earned more than a few candidates hours of IT or "initiative training" known to break more than one of them and once you were broken you were done. I refused to be done and I refused to quit. That's just who I was.

The sky was beginning to darken, warning Cato and I that we were behind schedule and while I was lost in my thoughts I must have slacked off of my pace and it seems he had slowed as well not helping our present situation. I glanced over at Cato and it was obvious he also noticed what I just had and we stepped up our pace. The familiar stride we fell into was known to us from years of conditioning runs as well as our nightly treks back to the training compound when we were given those rare 96's we used to see our families. Leave always gave me conflicting feelings, if I was eager to return to the compound what did that say about me? Did I actually enjoy the training I was subjected to? Some nights laying in bed I chalked it up to Stockholm's Syndrome but I knew that wasn't all of it. I didn't want to lose myself but at the same time was I finding myself?

"Rachel." Cato's voice broke through my stream of thoughts, he rarely asked questions, Cato made statements and if I didn't know him better I would think there was no emotion in his voice, but I did know him better and he could tell I was worried about something.

"I'm fine Cato." I responded and before increasing my pace more I added, "but we aren't going to be if the peacekeepers catch us getting to the compound late." I dug my toes into the loose rocks on the road and ran harder, losing myself once again in the familiar rhythm of my breathing and thud of my heart as I exerted myself. The answer I gave was a way of avoiding the question and he knew it, just as I knew he could tell something was bothering me.

"Then pick it up slow poke, this isn't a daisy run Curls." He grinned before increasing his pace to get ahead of me. I gritted my teeth and sighed before chasing after him while silently laughing at his use of my nickname he had given me three years ago when we officially became friends.

I was working out at the compound after hours in our "free period" for the day and was switching between circuits concentrating on my upper body that day. Finishing my fourth set of prechter bar curls and re-racking my weights I had the feeling you get someone is watching you and I turned around to throw a sharp comment at them to find Cato standing there, arms crossed with a grin on his face that only served to make me angry. It looked like he was mocking me.

"So Curls you done with the bar yet?" He asked in a tone which only solidified the fact he was mocking me, something I was definitely not going to let him get away with even if he had a few inches and a good fifty pounds on me. This guy radiated arrogance and for good reason, at 15 he had better muscle tone than most our age and you could tell he certainly put his time in at the gym. Still I thought he needed his ego knocked down a few dozen pegs.

"Yes I am done. But I should warn you when you sit down not to let that big head of yours tip you over. Also, probably a good thing I took all the weight I was using off that way you didn't have to ask for help with that." His smirk fell for a split second before he carefully placed it again but he didn't respond so I wrote it as a win in my books and walked away with a grin of my own. Little did I know that was the beginning of what would become the strongest friendship I have ever had because after that Cato eventually (albeit with continued teasing of me at the gym) introduced himself with a slightly smaller head and we became friends. I started calling him Smalls shortly afterwards just as a way to irritate him, which much to my pleasure, it did a thorough job of. Two years later and he was my best friend, never would I have guessed that one.

A siren went off and we tore across the remaining stretch of gravel leading up to the compound, flashing the guards at the gate our ID's we slipped inside as the gates were closing.

"That was cut way too close this time. Way too close." Cato was bent over with his hands on his knees catching his breath, the back of his grey shirt was almost completely darkened with sweat. "Are you sure you're all good? You were dogging in that run back R." He tilted his head towards me, no doubt trying to analyze my facial expressions in response to his question.

"C'mon we have less than five minutes before they close the shop and we have to check back in because I am not in the mood to deal with the Sergeant Major tomorrow if we get marked AWOL." I brought my own hands down from resting on top of my head, slung my pack over my shoulder, and picked up a jog in the direction of the main shop. I heard the crunch of gravel behind me from Cato and knew again I only avoided his question momentarily, but that was good enough for me.

I let him enter the duty hut first and check in, hoping maybe he would head to his barracks before I was out. Truth be told I didn't know what was bothering me, I loved my job but I was scared of what could happen if I went into the games, or what I would be like when I came out. Most of all though, I was scared to go into the games with Cato. There was no way I could beat him and there was no way he could beat me, all we could hope was someone else did the job for us. Everyone knew the rules, one victor. With both Cato and I going into the games the same year it was bound to be one of us, I knew it and so did he, just as we both knew we wouldn't be able to kill each other if it came down to it. I'd put a knife through my own chest before letting him live with the guilt of having to do it and he would do the same. It would be interesting to see how the Capitol would handle that situation if it did arise.

My hopes of walking back to the squad bay alone did not get answered Cato was standing outside the shop arms crossed the same way they were when we first officially met back in the gym.

"Rachel." Again with the first name shit, this was the second time in a span of an hour he used my actual name and not a nickname.

"What?" I responded but kept walking past him towards the neat row of grey stone buildings the candidates were housed in. A lamp overhead was flickering on and off and I could feel the dampness seeping in, rain was coming which meant tomorrow would be miserable if they decided we needed to go on a hike. "Cato. Seriously. I am fine."

"No, you aren't."

"Am I not allowed to be quiet without it being labeled as a crime?"

"Never said that."

"Then why do you keep asking."

"Am I not allowed to check up on my best friend without it being labeled as a crime?" I hated when he turned my words against me and he knew it, exactly why he did it, little snot.

"Cato" I stopped as I reached the familiar, weathered front of building 4, my building. Turning around he was standing exactly as I knew he would be. The street light making his pale blonde hair and slightly tanned skin washed out in appearance coupled with the dark grey of his shirt, his arms fell casually to his sides and the 'no bullshit' look on his face, his eyes serious.

The wind blew causing me to shiver in the dampness induced by both the weather and my cooling body causing the sweat to dry on my skin and my hair to come even more out of the braid I had it in before I began our run. If Cato could give the piercing looks I was just as adept at giving them back, and they normally got me out of questions, just not with him. It seemed he was the one exception to all the rules, he knew how to push which buttons if he needed to and right now he was using that skill. "I know something is swimming around in that curly head of yours. Don't give me the look you give to all the new applicants."

I groaned and let my bag fall from my shoulder, of course it fell on the outside of my foot which earned a few cuss words before I answered him. "I'm blaming that on you."

He crossed his arms and laughed "I didn't drop your pack on your foot goober."

"No but you stopped me from going to bed so I had to set it down and that is your fault." I glared at him because I really didn't want to talk about what was bothering me because it was weak and I wasn't weak.

"Well the sooner you tell me the faster you get to bed."

"Like you're going to stop me? I'd love to see that one."

"Don't make me and we won't find out."

"Bite me." I grabbed my bag and ran to my building, locking the door behind me just as his body slammed into it. "Sorry but I am going to bed. Night Smalls!" I heard him swear and could tell he was going to bug me about it tomorrow. Let him. I'd ignore it the same way I ignored it today. They discouraged us from becoming friends for a reason, because no one wants to kill your friends when it comes down to it. Its also why they try and make us the way the do - ruthless killers didn't have friends and we didn't think twice before releasing an arrow or driving a knife home. All of our actions were so we would come out on top, self preservation they told us. Killers didn't sacrifice themselves for someone else, humans did that and to some degree they tried to take that away from us.


	3. Chapter 2

My back still to the door I breathed a sigh of relief hoping I hadn't woken too many of the other candidates. No hallway lights flicked on so I took that as a good sign and re-shouldered my pack before heading to the rooms shared by myself and...

"Rachel?"

Dammit my suitemate was still up.

"Clove. Yeah its me." I didn't dislike her, she was actually my second closest friend here in the compound. I just didn't need her asking questions.

"I thought you were gonna get marked AWOL. Hadley or Compton with you?"

Riley Compton was the fourth member of our 'group', he was of similar build to Cato with dark brown hair and a hard jawline. I always told him he looked pissed off because of it and he always responded with I always looked like an electric current conductor because of my curly hair, it worked. Our group had an interesting dynamic, we never acted like friends inside the compound and outside I rarely ran into anyone other than Cato so we had the better connection but still Clove and Riley were as close as someone like I could have for friends.

"Hadley was. He was mister twenty questions tonight that's for sure. Don't know what got into him." I threw my shoes at the base of my rack before second thinking and straightening them up incase the staff decided to do an inspection tomorrow. "He wouldn't shut up. I think him and Compton need a boy slumber party so he gets whatever is in his system out."

She laughed at that. Clove and I grew up in this system from day one together, we had developed a connection and understood each other almost as well as Cato and I understood each other. "Boys will be boys, seriously and they say girls are the ones who ask too many questions." She stood at the doorway connecting our small, functional rooms and watched as I double checked my gear for the morning. After six years in the program it was something I knew better than the back of my hand and could do in my sleep.

"Agreed. How was your 96?" I knew Clove didn't go home. She was stuck with firewatch this last weekend as her rotation happened to be the unlucky one picked.

"Ugh, don't rub it in. If I had had more than freaking blanks I would have considered putting one between my eyes for the boredom I had to endure." Clove had a tendency to talk once you got her started, something I was not overly fond of. "Staff was pretty lenient though I think they want to give us a little break, if that even exists, this final month before the choosing ceremony."

I didn't want to think about the choosing ceremony, already I knew I was up for the boards and had even been told to prepare myself because it was looking like I was going to be picked to volunteer. Just as I somehow knew I would be chosen to volunteer, I knew the male volunteer would be Cato. We were the best. I think he knew it too but was just as reluctant to discuss it as I was.

"Did you even hear anything I just said?"

Obviously my focus was sorely lacking tonight this wasn't the first time someone caught me not paying attention, I needed to get my hair screwed back on or my ass was grass tomorrow in training. "Sorry Clove, I think I'm just tired tonight."

"Well get untired because tomorrow is our day off remember?"

 _Fuck_ "Yeah I do now."

"How'd you forget about the naming ceremony? Seriously this is what we've been training up for since we got shipped off to this place."

The naming ceremony was something unique to the districts, only those who actively trained candidates had them, not that we were supposed to be doing any of this anyways but the Capitol tended to look the other way when we had the products we supplied them with. Tomorrow was the day the top three candidates for both the men and women would be chosen, from there we would be put into our own training regimen to better prepare us for the games as well as to better focus on the candidates to select.

"I know you're going to be chosen, you were at the the top of the boards before you left on your 96. Hopefully they give me a shot although I highly doubt it, I was fourth and that isn't good enough." Clove pouted as she dropped back on her rack. "I wish I could have the chance."

The world we lived in was messed up. Here we were, eighteen years old and wishing single-mindedly for a chance to go fight in a sadistic game. At least that's what it looked like to outsiders. In reality there was commonly much more at stake, in my case my family needed the money because it would give my sister a shot at a normal life, it could give my mother some peace of mind knowing she didn't have to beg and borrow to keep up with my father's dangerous addictions. For those reasons I was more than prepared to take my shot at the games. I was prepared and I was ready, I just didn't want to have to face my friends in them.

0445 came too early. I heard the call for lights and I wanted to cuss someone out, maybe I did but I don't remember. What I remember was assembling with my fellow candidates, stoically standing at attention awaiting the announcement. I remember hearing my name called out along with Clove's, Compton's, and of course Cato's, the other names which were called meant little to me. I just knew from now on I would be competing with my friends and I wasn't sure I knew how I wished the future to play out.

"Wilkins! Wilkins!" Clove was running up to me as I made my way silently back to the squad bay. "I made it. Can you believe that? I mean I always knew you would but the fact I made it was amazing! My family is going to be so proud of me. I doubt my mother will know what to do with the extra tessere she is getting now. I can't let them down and I am so glad I haven't yet, even though we all know it's going to be a pretty steep climb to the arena from here but I at least feel it's possible you know?"

"Yeah Merriman, it's going to be a steep climb that's for sure. You can do it though. I know you can." I made my attempt at smiling to finish my statement but I felt it came out more as a grimace. From this point on I knew nothing would be the same between our little 'family' group, the point of this elimination was to throw the final candidates into an environment where we couldn't help but be pitted against each other. I felt a quiet sigh escape my lips but kept my expression controlled, a skill I thanked the years of training at the compound for.

"Are you coming out with the rest of us tonight? Some of the candidates want to congratulate those of us who made the selection, I'm sure they would love to have you there as well! One last celebration?" For the quiet and cold girl whom I first met she sure had drastically changed and right now I almost would have preferred the former Clove. I had been training for years to deal with uncomfortable scenarios and now was no time to forget it.

"Of course I'm coming, but you better be ready to be partied under the table!" She laughed at that and drug me towards our rooms to get ready.

There was one "bar" within the compound's walls usually reserved for instructors as well as visiting Capitol officials, tonight was the only night candidates were allowed to enter and we planned to make the most of it. Tomorrow was a free day and then the real training would begin. I threw the feelings I had felt earlier in the day out the window, telling myself I would disregard the rules this one night, let myself go for one night before focusing on the task at hand. The games coming up would be difficult enough to endure and I was not about to bring others into the situation unnecessarily so after tonight I was going to face this alone.

Clove whirled around the dance floor, the effects of not drinking alcohol in the past years clearly having an effect on her. I couldn't help but laugh into my own drink, although unlike her I had been nursing the same one since I got here two hours ago. The bar was flowing generously and all the candidates who came tonight seemed to all be enjoying the party with reckless abandon, enjoying this night of freedom and dancing along to the deep bass resonating throughout the establishment. Despite telling myself to let loose some I couldn't shake the ingrained sense of responsibility which was rooted so deeply in my mind, keeping me from joining the rest of my peers in a haze of buzzed thoughts and clouded judgement. I finished my first drink and was about to start my second, two strong drinks ought to have some effect, at least enough to get me slightly buzzed yet not enough to cause me to have regrets in the morning when I woke up.

"What's up with little miss antisocial tonight?" Compton smoothly slid onto the stool next to me, leaning his back to the bar as I was to watch the others dance under the flickering lights. He held his own amber colored drink in his hand and from the flush across his cheeks I could tell it wasn't his first one. "Good lord it's hot in here. Is it hot to you?" He asked with less focus than normal. I took in what he chose as his party attire, for the most part it was within the regulations for candidate's standard civilian wear, dark washed jeans and a collared, fitted button up in a pale green, and the source of his increased perception of heat, a brown leather jacket. If he was going for a cool and sophisticated look it was quickly getting ruined by the perspiration forming around his hairline and trailing down his neck.

"Well idiot, you're the one wearing a leather jacket on top of a long sleeve shirt. So I don't know you tell me." He should have expected a remark similar to the one I just gave him for the stupid question he asked, after all out of everyone in the group he tended to walk right into these situations more than he should have been able to statistically.

"Good point Wilkins. See this is why you can't go getting your head lopped off in the games. You're the brains, Clove is the humor, and Cato is the muscle! We've got it all worked out. No throwing the dynamic off with dying." He took another swig from his glass, clinking the ice off the corners of the glass a few times before downing it in another swallow. I laughed and took my own sip before turning to face him.

"Oh and so what does that leave you? The good looks?"

He grinned and set his glass down on the bar so he could place either hand on my shoulders. "See sugar, you've got it!" I contended that maybe drunk Riley was kind of funny and funny was exactly what I needed tonight.  
"Yes but Compton you seem to have forgotten, good looks are disposable. So unless you've got something else to offer I suggest you keep your pretty, little mouth shut." I let the humor be very evident in my voice to avoid the chance of him taking it the wrong way and even added a smirk for good measure.

"I know I'm a great role model but the fact you smirk almost as well as I do is getting scary R." Cato distanced himself from the dancefloor, where I assumed he previously was before coming over to add his two, cocky cents to the conversation. He too was had a light sheen covering his forehead and even under the lights I could tell his usually sandy blonde hair had been darkened because of it. Unlike our friend however he was not idiotic enough to be wearing a leather jacket and simply went with a fitted, burgundy buttoned shirt which he had rolled the sleeves on and khakis. As candidates we were expected to always represent our district in everything we did, even while on breaks from our training, and part of this was in how we dressed. Tonight some of the candidates had chosen to ignore the expected rules and I knew they were foolish if they thought tonight was a free pass for their behavior and was why Clove and I had also stuck to the guidelines. As candidates who were chosen for the final six we would be examined even closer than the others and retribution would be swift for those not in compliance with the rules.

"And not only are you modeling my smirk but is that makeup I see? It can't be. I think I need to go to medical first thing tomorrow and get my eyes checked again." Cato feigned surprise at his observation before cracking another of his rare smiles. I could only roll my eyes in response.

"Yeah yeah yeah. I decided to be a girl tonight. Shoot me." It was true. My usual attire of cargo pants and a tank top for training was replaced by a tasteful, sleeveless, black dress which went to mid thigh and had a teardrop cutout in the back allowing my long curls to tickle the exposed skin there. Perhaps the most shocking difference other than the makeup was the addition of four inches to my height from the black patent shoes I was wearing.

"No, no one is shooting you! We should be allowed to dress in things other than drab grey issued gear and God forbid us wear makeup! Seriously Cato I'm sure you've seen stranger things in your 18 years of life than girls actually being somewhat normal?" Clove swooped in and rounded on Cato good heartedly, although quite soundly. She too had traded out her training gear for a dress, her's a deep green in color and nude heels to complement the attire, elongating her legs.

"No Merriman, that is where you are so wrong." Compton rejoined the conversation. "Girls are NEVER normal. Am I right Cato?" This served to cause both of the guys to double over in laughter and even toast to Riley's clever joke.

Men. I rolled my eyes again, I needed to watch how often I did that or I may end up loosening the tendons holding my eyes in place and that would be a mess.

"Oh ha ha boys. Very funny." An annoyed Clove pushed back the stray hairs stuck to her face from the dancing she had done. "And if you two lugs are done making jokes about the girls who manage to tolerate your cocky asses we are here to party and I intend to do so." She turned to the bartender and downed a shot of some clear liquid before grabbing Riley by his elbow and all but dragging him into the crowd of people occupying the dance floor. Cato and I were left with what I can only guess were matching expressions of shock at the way Clove manhandled Compton.

"Well that settles that then I suppose." I glanced over at him as he finished his drink before turning and waiting to ask the bartender for another. He dwarfed the stool he currently had his 6'4" frame squished onto and the sleeves on his shirt were clearly verging on being too small. No wonder he always seemed to intimidate people, the man had a serious complex going for him.

"Hey Wilkins, could I steal you for a dance?" I turned back around to identify the new voice behind me having a faint recognition but being unable to place it. Aaron Cornish stood in front of me. He was by far one of my least favorite in the group of candidates my age, I also believe he was the third male to be chosen now that I was actively focusing on the event. He had always had a feeling about him which made me uneasy. I had only spoken to Cato about this as Clove seemed enamored with the man, I couldn't say it was completely unfounded. Cornish was probably around 6'2" with an impressive body and honeyed brown hair, and that was before he flashed his perfectly whitened teeth. Which ironically happened to be his problem. Aaron never seemed to know when to stop flirting, he viewed the female candidates as weaker than the males and only good for their amusement. To say I disliked the man would be a slight understatement - Aaron Cornish made my skin crawl.

"No she may not be stolen for a dance Cornish, she's busy. And even if she could that is not the way you ask a lady to a dance. So fuck off." Cato's arm was around my waist and most of his body was placed between myself and Cornish.

"Man I wasn't meaning anything I just wanted a dance. She's a finalist and this night is for us to celebrate." Aaron's whole attitude changed as his stance folded slightly and he diverted his eyes from looking at Cato directly.

"Yes she is. But right now she is busy because I already asked for a dance first. So wait your turn like a good boy Cornish." Cato all but snarled at him. He was known to have a short temper and be rather confrontational so his reaction was not a surprise, it was the show he put on to keep up his ruthless candidate facade. However, I was getting rather fed up with the pissing contest these two seemed to be having so I untangled myself from under Cato's heavy arm and addressed Aaron myself.

As much as I detested the man I refrained from acting brash as Cato had, instead I knew the course of action I was planning on taking would irritate him just as much. "Sorry Cornish, Hadley is right though, I do owe him a dance right now. I'm sure there's plenty of girls here who would love a dance with you."I then mimicked Clove and pulled Cato after me into the mess of sweaty bodies on the dance floor.

"What the fuck was that all about? When did I turn into some weak little flower who needed 'Big bad Cato Hadley' to protect me?" I rounded on my companion as soon as we were in the thick of the dancers, the music too deafening to allow others to really hear the conversation unless they were really focusing on us. I knew my blue eyes were conveying all the irritation I felt right now at his macho man bullshit he just pulled back there.

"He's a prick Rachel and I know how you feel about him. Plus any day I can piss of Cornish is a good day." Cato defended his actions with the same irritation I was addressing him with. "Besides, do you really think he would have backed off with a simple no? He is just trying to get in your head and on top of it he was drunk."

Deep down I knew he was right, Cornish was not the type to take no for an answer. He used women, he didn't value or respect them.

"Fine. But if you pull that shit again I will personally see to the rearrangement of your face Hadley." I scowled at him before realizing a few others were beginning to look at us so I raised my arms up to his broad shoulders to at least appear as if we were trying to dance.

"Anyone ever tell you Wilkins. You suck at this whole party thing." Cato laughed a deep rumbling laugh, all traces of his previous annoyance with me was gone, much to my relief. Cato and I never stayed mad at each other long. "Just follow my lead." He spun me around and pulled me so my back was to him, the whole time keeping on of his hands on my own. I felt safe with his hand holding mine and although I knew I could take care of myself it was nice to know someone else was looking out for your safety. Apparently I was going to learn how the whole party thing worked tonight. The faster pace songs made for a good rhythm and combined with the alcohol I was loosened up enough to forget the fact we were all in this for a reason. Tonight we were just a bunch of teenagers having fun. I spotted Clove and Riley together a little ways over, his hand resting on her stomach and the other twined in her own. I could tell they would most definitely have a hangover tomorrow if the level of drunkenness they were exhibiting presently was any indicator. Then again Cato and I weren't in all that different of a position and we were pretty sober. The one difference between how we were and the majority of the others on the floor, I could tell we were most definitely not having sex, the others I wasn't so sure about.

I leaned my head back to be able to talk to him without shouting so much "You know Cornish isn't here anymore Cato, you don't have to dance with me."

"Yeah I know. But I did say I owed you a dance and I am not one to go back on my word, even if this hardly qualifies as a dance." He had bent down to speak it more directly into my ear, even with the added height from my heels he still had a good 3 inches on me, his larger body shadowed my own from behind. I could tell why Clove had been so sweaty, this was like being inside a greenhouse at District 11 with all the people in such close proximity, not to mention basically being cocooned by a personal heater. My feet screamed for a break but I was actually enjoying myself too much to listen to them, pain was merely weakness leaving the body and right now I just knew I had one night to be normal and I wasn't going to waste it.

The tempo resonating from the speakers around the room switched suddenly to a slower paced song and those dancing either left to go get another drink or they switched the way they were dancing. "Now this is more like a dance." Cato said into my ear before turning me around once more to face him, his hands rested lightly at my waist and I returned my hands to his shoulders. It was comfortable just being here safe with my best friend and my other two close friends nearby also enjoying their night as we slowly circled our way across the floor. The entirety of the song Cato and I were comfortably silent, content to listen to the bird notes carrying through the song. This moment of peace would be shattered come Monday when the real training began, when I turned off the switch to my emotions and closed doors tightly on my relationships. In two short days this would all be a distant memory and I wanted to have a good one to cherish. Something told me I would need it.

All too soon the quiet song that was playing was over with and the heavy bass beat filled the room again. I really needed a drink and Cato seemed to as well so we wove our way through the others back to the bar and slid easily into two empty chairs. I couldn't tell what I wanted more, another drink or to be able to peel off this infernal dress and put on some real clothes, the attraction of the social gathering only held so much appeal to me before I began to feel the urges for peaceful quietness. "I think I may head back to the squad bay Cato. I'm about at my max for social time this evening." The bartender brought me a glass of water and I began downing it to cool my body and staite the dryness in my throat. "Heels may look nice but I'd take my boots any day of the week." He laughed consequently began choking on his own water which he was in the process of swallowing when I made my comment. "Breathe Cato, in and out, in and out." I commented sarcastically as he worked to regain normal control of his respiratory system.

"Smartass. It was your fault I choked to begin with. For some reason you get especially sassy when you're buzzing. Maybe we should get you out more often Wilkins."

For some reason reality chose to come crashing abruptly back down on me in that moment and it had a rather sobering effect. "Yeah lets talk about just let me know if you're referring to after or before the games Cato." He frowned at that response and he seemed to be sobered by that thought as well.

"I think I'm going to head back to the squad bays as well. I'll walk with you." He stood and waited for me to walk past him before he followed me to the exit. I shared a glance with Clove to let her know where I'm headed and so she can see Hadley was with me. The last thing I wanted was a lecture from Clove for my disappearing act. Riley was still next to her so I knew she would be alright for the remainder of the night as well.


	4. Chapter 3

The brisk air to hit my flushed face was a welcomed relief from the sticky atmosphere of the bar I had just left, however it quickly became colder than was comfortable and I inwardly groaned at the walk across the compound back to our bays. _Dammit_. I cursed myself for laughing at Riley's jacket because karma was biting me in the ass because of it. I stopped for a moment to pull my shoes off before I all but snapped the infernal things off because I did rather enjoy them upon occasion and it would be a shame to ruin them in a fit of rage.

Wind tunneled between the orderly rows of grey buildings in the compound as Cato and I made our way back to the quadrant where our year's candidates were housed. My hair was whipped around, no doubt twisting it into more knots than it already was in from the night I had spent at the party but I truly didn't care. "I thought alcohol was supposed to warm you up from the insides." I mumbled under my breath as we continued down the roads lit by flickering, overhead, fluorescent lamps, the whole compound either asleep as it was 0200 or at the party which we had just left from. It made for an eerie feeling walking down a compound usually so alive with hustle and bustle.

"You're cold." Cato stated matter of factly before pulling off a black leather jacket I hadn't even noticed he was wearing before now, he must have left it somewhere at the party and picked it up before we left. Maybe he was the one who should be given the title of the brains of our group having the foresight to bring a jacket, or maybe I needed to avoid any and all alcohol from now on because it seriously screwed with my observation skills. I did observe the instant warmth seeping into my body though as he placed the overly large jacket around my shoulders. "Don't argue with me Rach. I'm not pulling macho man bullshit as you called it. I'm helping my friend out because she's too stubborn for her own good."

Sometimes I really wanted to hug the man who walked next to me. For growing up in a situation where relationships of any kind were highly frowned upon we did a pretty good job of forging a solid one with each other. "What's on your mind now Curls? You've got a goofy grin on your face."

I laughed quietly and told him of the thought I just had regarding our friendship even though the situation pretty fucked up. He agreed with me but added maybe we were just crazy enough to think we could defy the system and get away with it. Well so far we had and that's what mattered. What also mattered was the glorious sight of the simple grey buildings ahead I couldn't seem to get into fast enough.

Walking through the door into my room I was already peeling my dress away from my body and flinging the irritating heels into the bottom of my footlocker. Standing there in just my undergarments was tempting seeing as putting on my sleep clothes seemed like entirely too much work at them moment. However, I convinced myself to put forth the effort and had just crawled into bed after scrubbing the make-up off my face when I heard the knocking on my door. _Dammit Clove. How do you forget your key._ The knocking was continued at a faster pace and it grated on my irritation. I all but stomped, rather unladylike, to the door and hastily pulled my curls into a ponytail before opening it.

"Cato." He was definitely not the person I was expecting. "I thought you were going to bed." It was more of a statement than a question. Mostly because that is where I wanted to be at this very moment and I had to suppress the urge to tell him so, something was off and I could tell. He was changed out of the clothes he wore to the party and was instead in a simple white tee and black sweatpants and I could see the dampness in his hair from a quick shower.

"I realized I didn't get a chance to tell you I really enjoyed tonight and I know you're the last one to really be all gung ho about parties but I think it was a good thing you went out." He smiled sheepishly and I couldn't help but smile back. How he just acted confirmed my suspicious there was something eating him up inside, Cato rarely looked or acted as unsure of himself as he just did.

"Oh get in here Smalls. I doubt Clove will be back for another couple of hours and even if she did she's broken the rules enough times she wouldn't rat me out." Squad bay rules were no males in female quarters, especially at night time but I couldn't count how often our little group broke those rules staying up late helping one another prepare for the coming day with marking gear, or testing each other on our knowledge.

As soon as I turned to face him after closing the door I could immediately feel the change in him, seeing it only helped confirm further. His shoulders fell along with his head. Cato leaned back against the wall with his arms crossed, his usual smug and confident look replaced by one of weariness. "We're really the ones aren't we? This is happening. Its really happening." He allowed himself to slide down the wall, sitting with his head on his knees.

I had never seen him so vulnerable. The Cato shown to the world was a much different man than the one sitting in front of me fisting his cropped, sandy hair in clenched hands. My gut twisted knowing I couldn't help him because you can't very well throw a lifeline to someone if you both are stuck on the same doomed ship. My back hit the wall next to him as I slid down it to sit next to him. We knew each other well enough for the silence to be comforting instead of suffocating. It felt like someone had poured mercury into my veins and replaced my bones for lead. We hadn't even been chosen yet but we knew it was only a matter of time, the countdown had begun. I turned my head to face my best friend, his head leaned back against the wall, eyes closed, breath coming in even counts now. He had lost control for a moment and had allowed his composure to crack, even for a second it was dangerous and he knew it. We were always told losing our bearing would get us or someone else killed, even if between the two of us we knew we were safe it was a hard thing to override.

"We're going to be okay Smalls."

"I know we are R. You're the brains, you'll figure something out." I saw a smile faintly appear on his face before he turned his head. "How do you think we've stayed out of trouble all these years?" It was true, we were model candidates but that didn't mean we hadn't pushed the lines quite a few times. Some of those times it had been sheer dumb luck we hadn't gotten expelled for our stunts but yet Cato still always insisted it was because of something I did.

"I don't want to lose myself in this game the Capitol plays Cato." He picked his head up off his knees and looked at me, his grey eyes full of mixed emotions. It came out of my mouth before I could stop it, surprising myself as much as it surprised him. We didn't talk this way, we were strong, we were the best, we would win. Or one of us would. "They keep us from making friends for a reason. This reason." I knew he would understand what I was saying.

His face hardened and he looked ahead again. "I can and will kill anyone I need to in order to win the games." My heart stopped for a moment, maybe Cato was as he appeared to be on the outside. Maybe it wasn't a facade but instead his friendship was. However, if that was the case he wouldn't have come to my room tonight looking broken. Turning to face me again this time with his whole upper body instead of just looking at me, a soft expression on his face, he said. "Except you. I can't even think of someone else killing you without feeling like I need to kill

that person who would think to hurt you."

Cato was doing something I couldn't. All during the run back to the compound yesterday I had this running through my head. How could I kill my best friend? And yet I couldn't tell him, but here he was telling me.

"I know you're not weak and you can protect yourself but I can't help it. You're the one person whom I can trust and without you here I probably would have lost myself to the killer they try and make us into."

He was showing more emotion than he had in his entire life right now, and to be honest it was scaring me. So rarely did we let ourselves become emotional I didn't know how to handle it and I doubt he did either.

"We don't need to think about that right now." I couldn't keep looking at him, his eyes were begging me to be strong for both of us and that wasn't something I could manage right now. "We're here to bring honor to our families, our district." Sighing at the automated response I just gave him and silently hating myself for not being strong enough to say what I really wanted to say, to tell him I was scared out of my mind, that I would end my life before letting himself do the same. He was the third child in his family, his father had passed away, two older brothers had died before him in the games, he was all his mother had left, he deserved to live. Just the fact he was able to tell me what was going on in his head proved that fact.

"Don't feed me the bullshit Capitol response Rachel." He sounded more tired than angry. "It's not how you feel and I know it. Something is bothering you, and I also know you won't say anything until you're good and ready so I'll wait."

"How do you do that? How do you just know?" I turned to look at him once more, the windows allowed for the only light coming into the room from the street lamps outside to hollow out his face, aging him a decade or so and adding to the tiredness in his voice.

"I know you better than anyone Rachel."

"I know you do Cato." I sighed again, I seemed to be doing a lot of that tonight, clearly it was the alcohol.

"Come here Rach." I felt the weight of Cato's arm across my shoulders and I slid closer to him. We were taking what little comfort there was to be had given our situation, using each other as an anchor. "We'll figure out the games. But not tonight." I nodded in agreeance and let myself relax, both mentally and physically.


	5. Chapter 4

***CLOVE***

Clove stumbled into the room she shared with Rachel, kept upright only by the arm tightly wrapped around her waist which she believed belonged to Compton. At least she hoped it did. Everything was far too fuzzy for her to draw a concrete conclusion, her thoughts were concentrating on one thing, and one thing only - getting to her bed. Preferably completing this without too much injury to her person. God she was never drinking this much again. "What the.. ?" Compton's voice pierced harshly through the haze surrounding her brain. Clearly he handled his alcohol better than she did.

"Shuu the fuck up Co'ton. 'Oo loud." She managed to mumble out. Her head throbbing, this was going to be hell tomorrow, or today, whatever the fuck it was. Looking up though she was able to make out her roommates rack. She was also able to tell there wasn't a person in it like there should have been. Her brain may have been fuzzy but she was coherent enough to put two and two together. "Wher' ?" She scanned the room hoping to catch a clue as to Wilkins location. "Oh." What she was not expecting to see was her two friends leaning against each other, fast asleep. Cato's white shirt allowed Clove to see them a bit better given her state as well as the darkness of the room. His arm was around her shoulders and his head rested on top of hers.

"Why are they on the floor?" Compton asked. Clove began to wonder if he always asked stupid questions. When she didn't answer he continued, "Should we wake them up?"

She turned to him. Movements. Too quick. The room spun and she grabbed the end of her rack to stop it, almost falling in the process as her insufferable heels threw off her already compromised balance. "Wha' the fuck do you thin'. He gets caught in her' and shit hi's the fan." She reached down to take the shoes off her feet before they caused her any more harm. "Wa' tem uppp." Why didn't he take the initiative so she didn't have to keep talking.

Compton moved over towards them and went to touch Cato's shoulder but withdrew his hand almost as if shocked. "Last time someone woke him up they almost didn't keep the arm they touched him with."

"Fuc'ing do it." She was getting irritated but there was no way she was walking over there because at the present moment she was just concentrating on keeping those appetizers she ate at the party from making an unwelcome appearance.

Compton exhaled before waking Cato up, not that he didn't follow that up with a hasty step backwards out of Cato's reach.

"The fuck man?" Cato swore. Clearly someone was not a morning person. Or a wakeup person as more appropriate to the situation.

"You two were passed out. Couldn't leave you there. Not that the cold floor didn't look inviting enough, almost thought about joining you two." Riley never knew when to shut his mouth, clearly Cato was not having his jokes right now as he responded with an icy glare directed at him. Moving very calculated he pulled himself from behind Clove's still sleeping roommate and effortly picked her up to place her on her rack. The throw blanket she kept on top of her footlocker was used to cover her and in a swirl of movement Clove didn't bother to follow the two males were gone. Replaced by glorious silence.

***CATO***

He entered his and Compton's room and made sure to shut the door quietly as to not wake anyone on the floor up who may already be back and in bed.

"So how'd you and Wilkins end up asleep on the floor looking all snuggly and shit."

"Seriously man?" Cato was sure to make the annoyance in his voice evident in his counter question. "What do you honestly think? In case you didn't notice we both had clothes on."

"Clothes can be put back on mate."

"Fuck off Compton. We were talking and with the combination of the party and alcohol we passed out. End of story. Not that it mattered to you anyways." Compton was a pain in the ass. "Now if you're done whining because you didn't get any with Merriman like you so obviously wanted to tonight, shut up." That one got him to shut up. Served him right. If there was one thing Cato was never okay with it was getting woken up when he wasn't planning on it. Those who were unlucky enough to be the ones to do so usually ended up on the receiving end of his resulting bad mood.

***RACHEL***

I was on a bed, my bed, and had a blanket over me. Groaning I struggled to piece together the ending of last night as I couldn't recall actually going to bed. Clove was still comatose on her rack, she hadn't even bothered to change out of her dress and simply passed out on top of the covers. Something tells me she was in for a rough day today, which meant she wasn't going to be up for at least another couple of hours giving me ample time to go deal with this minimal lapse of my memory. To most this would be simply a factor of the night and the party but to me it caused unexplainable anxiety. I was assuming Cato had woken up and placed me in my bed before leaving but I needed him to confirm it.

"Cato! Open the damned door" I banged on the hatch to his squad bay, knowing full well with the number of sleeping males in the building would either someone would go find Cato for me if he didn't hear me or open the door themselves to restore the peace. It wasn't that I was irritated persay, I just needed a reaction and knew this was the best route to achieve one. Luckily for me the instructors were housed in a separate quadrant of the compound, watching the newer applicants and trusting us older tributes to take care of ourselves, otherwise I'd be getting a chit right now.

I began pounding on the steel door again when it was suddenly thrown open and I had to catch myself from falling rather ungracefully on my face.

"What could you possibly want at 0500. Because if you have needs only your little boy toy can fill then I suggest you leave." Of course it had to be him who opened the bloody door.

"Fuck you Cornish." I laced as much venom into my voice as I could and made sure to hold his gaze the entire time.

"You'd be a lot more intimidating if you weren't standing there half dressed Wilkins. Although I can't say I'm not appreciating the view."

In my haste to confirm Cato had put me back in bed last night I hadn't even thought to put on something other than what I usually slept in. Luckily for me I slept in a white sports bra and my grey PT shorts but nonetheless I had less clothing on than I ever walked around in at the compound. "You're just jealous I'm here to see Cato and not you. Sorry Cornish, the whole asshole thing, yeah major turnoff." Instead of crossing my arms I kept them calmly at my sides and bit back the uncomfortableness urging me to just leave and go back to my squad bay. I could tell with my lack of a reaction I had gotten him slightly with that one as his face showed a trace of irritation before his usual cockiness took hold again.

"I suggest you not say another word unless you wish to lose you tongue Aaron. Or maybe better yet your eyes." Cato growled at the man blocking the doorway and had the misfortune of mouthing off to me in front of him. "I thought we discussed this last night but clearly you need to learn how to speak to a lady, honestly it's a wonder you get any action at all with the tail end of that little performance I saw." If there was one man who could maintain his own dignity while also shredding the other person it was Cato.

Cornish stepped back a pace so he was no longer blocking the doorway and attempted to say something but Cato cut him off, "Unless you want to dig a deeper hole I suggest you fuck off, and if I hear you say anything like you just did to her to any other girl it may be the last time you say something."

"You think you can just threaten me? I'm not the one having feelings for another candidate! Wait until I tell the instructors this one. You'll be done." Cornish fired back at Cato. His gaze hardening as he assumed, wrongfully, he had Cato on something.

"One, I'm not, Rachel is a fellow candidate who has worked as hard as anyone to be on the top. I wouldn't be so selfish to take that away from her through something as stupid as what you are suggesting. Secondly, to accuse anyone of anything you must have proof. Tell me Cornish do you have any?" Cato was holding back a laugh as he pointed out the flaws in Aaron's allegations. Hearing the argument Cato brought made me laugh as well, but it also stirred something inside me I couldn't quite describe, it was almost sadness or regret but those options didn't make sense so I swallowed hard and pushed those unknown feelings down.

Cornish was struggling to come up with a response but was failing quite miserably and it was written all over his face.

"Haven't you been told not to think so hard and strain what little brain function you have going on up there? You'll pop a blood vessel, or worse you'll have that look permanently on your face and mess up that pretty boy face of yours and then your last means of getting the girls would be lost." Cato was enjoying riling up Aaron all too much, although I couldn't say I wasn't enjoying the show as I felt a smirk cross my face.

"Just you wait until training, you think you're so great but you're just like everyone else here Hadley." Cornish tried his best to sound intimidating and stood up straighter but his 6'2" frame was dwarfed by Cato's larger and taller one.

"Keep telling yourself." And with that he pushed past Aaron and joined me outside where I could feel the first rays of heat as the sun was just beginning to come up over the edges of the compound's buildings. Unlike other candidates, I never seemed to have a problem getting up early on my days off from training as it allowed me to watch the sunrise in the peaceful lull of the morning hours.

"So are you gonna tell me why you felt the need to come pounding on my squad's door and wake us all up this morning?" Cato asked, a slightly amused tone to his deep baritone voice.

"I seriously doubt I woke everyone up. Some of you boys can sleep through anything."

"Okay maybe Compton and Sanchez were still out, but yeah you got up almost everyone there Curls, almost as effective as the DI's when they come through. Nice job." His light banter was refreshing after the unwelcomed irritation I received from the run in with Aaron.

"Oh whatever. It's too nice outside to still be sleeping." In the distance I could hear the call of cadence as younger platoons ran their morning PT. "Oh how I don't miss hell Mondays" I commented before continuing on to answer his question. "Did you put me on my bed last night? I remember us talking but I know I didn't get to bed before you left."

He stopped abruptly to turn and look at me. "You come and demand my presence before 0500 to ask me that?! Seriously Rach? Another hour or so of sleep would have been nice. We aren't all able to run on little to no sleep like you are Crazy." He continued his light joking and we resumed our aimless walking down rows of identical building housing all the initiates.

***CATO***

"Yes, I put you back on your bed before I left. We fell asleep on the floor and I doubted you wanted to be left there." He couldn't figure out why Rachel was so concerned about it. He looked over and could tell she was thinking, about what he was still trying to figure out since they ran back to the compound together. Her blonde hair was thrown up messily from sleep with a few rogue curls escaping the restrictive tie despite her efforts to keep it from doing so, it was rather amusing her constant struggle with those curls which earned her the nickname he liked to use.

"Oh. No that would have been uncomfortable. Thank you." There she was again, going off on some unknown thought train within her own head. He wanted a look inside that curly head of hers, just to see what had her troubled. They got to the end of the day they had been walking down and almost without realizing where they were headed arrived at the outer wall, a place he knew Rachel would go when she had some free time and wanted a break to think or just get away from the commotion of the candidate life. The sun was just reaching the tops of the buildings painting the sky in golden hues and warming their skin as they both seemed to have ventured out in their sleep clothes, although his consisted of just his sweat bottoms he wore the night before as he chose to ditch the shirt while he slept. Rachel was ahead of him now as he had slowed to watch the sun color the sky and she was already half way up the ladder used to enter the guard post on top of the wall. She had definitely changed from the 15 year old he was intrigued by in the gym three years ago and you could see the results of the intensive training they were put through in as the muscles in her back contracted and moved while she climbed. Once she was up he followed her to arrive at the top and see her standing with her eyes closed soaking in the sun which danced off her blonde hair, she looked peaceful and truly at ease which he hadn't seen since they had returned two days ago. He wondered how the games would change her. She hadn't talked about it yet but he could already see she was the top candidate, it would genuinely surprise him if she was not the one chosen to compete, a thought which both terrified him and made him genuinely proud of his friend. Over the last nine years she had worked with the sole purpose of providing for her family and to protect her younger sister from the same fate. Unfortunately he did not grow up with a family with members who thought to protect each other. At the age of 11 his oldest brother was entered in the games - despite the fact he was a strong tribute he was the sixth killed, some kid from District 4 got lucky with a trident throw. The following year his father was killed through a self induced drug overdose mixed with alcohol leaving his mother and her two remaining children without a source of income causing the entrance of her remaining two children into the tribute pool. Two years later when he was 13 his brother was selected into the games and almost won making it till the very last two, only to be killed by an infection from a wound he hadn't even realized was infected to the extent it was. Now he was all that was left and his mother had all but forgotten who he even was as her mind was plagued with a disease stealing her memory and forcing her into home where she could be cared for. His situation wasn't one to really miss while he was gone, and even when he was allowed to go home the small place he used to call home was empty and no amount of hours spent with his mother at her facility was every going to bring it back but at least it helped. However, it was also the reason he needed to go into the games with this girl who sat next to him under the morning sun's rays, because she needed to come home and he would do everything in his power to ensure that.


	6. Chapter 5

Hey guys,

So I just wanted to say I really appreciate all those who have come through and read my story. I'm still really new to this but am definitely enjoying the experience so far! Also I apologize for the slow updates, its difficult with my work schedule to know when I will have time but do not worry I won't just leave the story on hiatus. I'd also really love comments/feedback on what you guys think as I want to put out stories you all want to read and the only way to know that is through your reviews.

I'd also like to thank my good friend Jared for reading through this for me even though he's dealing with an equally busy life.

Thanks guys! Happy reading and I sincerely hope you enjoy Chapter 5 in Fated.

Eralisse Grace

***RACHEL***

Training for the select final candidates progressed smoothly and as we expected it to go, it was fast, furious, and absolutely relentless. We were pushed mentally, physically, and emotionally to become better in every aspect all while constantly being evaluated to determine who would be chosen as the volunteer tribute. Each night it seemed I was going to bed later and having to wake up earlier, my body was being wore down and each movement called forth a complaint from the corresponding muscle group I had to mentally override to keep going. Quitting wasn't an option though and we all knew it, not only were we past the point of no return we all had worked half our lives for this point and our very being would not have allowed it. However, that didn't mean it wasn't a damn illustrious vision to think about. The strain was evident on each of the candidates and what was different this round was the competition was even more intense than the nine years leading up to this point. Looking around the expansive room I could barely recognize some of the candidates I was training with from their former selves and it led me to question if I looked as bad as they did. Clove's usual perceptive gaze was looking more clouded and unfocused each day, and faint purple circles were surrounding her usually attentive eyes, although her performance with her knives remained as deadly as before. The other female candidate, Emma Summers, a rather average looking tribute with mousy brown hair and an athletic build, was known to be proficient in most weapons systems but specialized in her archery but her performance was beginning to fall as the weeks wore on and so in my mind I counted her out, which meant it was down to Clove and myself.

The males selected were Cornish, Compton, and Hadley. None of these guys were strangers to the gym and the physical toll was less noticeable on them than it was us, however they too were straining under the mental burden placed upon us and I could tell one of them was close to cracking. A situation I wanted to be as far away from when it happened as possible. I turned after practicing setting a simple trap to watch a sparring match begin between Compton and Cornish, each yielding their chosen weapon of a lightweight composite spear, the silver glinting menacingly as they sized each other up. While Cornish clearly had Riley in sheer size he was largely outmatched in maneuverability where Riley took the prize. These distinctions would make for an interesting matchup, especially since we had been sparring each other for weeks now and could easily know what each person's common responses were. There were no surprises anymore in technique, the winner was simply who could outsmart or outmaneuver the other. Suddenly Cornish made a jab at Riley which was easily avoided and in turn countered by Compton's own attack towards his aggressor which was slightly more successful with a graze to Cornish's off upper arm. If Cornish knew Riley had struck him he didn't show a sign of it and continued his offensive on him, attempting to catch a weak point or to throw him off guard. They went back and forth with a deadly precision and undeniable grace to their movements, I had to credit both of them as they were easily two of the most skilled candidates, but then again they wouldn't be here if they weren't. This week we were going through a bracket system of sparring each other, so far today Cato had beaten Riley and Clove had beaten Emma, neither was a surprise to me. Suddenly Cornish threw Riley off the raised platform and with a crash the sparring match was over. Compton cursed up a storm but he knew he had been beaten, if he acted out he would have been disciplined and possibly kicked out of the training. His displeasure showed on his face as he took his place in the lineup again next to Cato with a scowl marring his usual jovial face.

While we had instructors in the room with us while sparing the atmosphere had a touch of casual to it still. However, a door slammed and the steel soled shoes of Capitol citizens sent bolts of noise resounding through the room which seemed to resound in the very depths of my bones, no matter how many times the very idea of fear had been all but beaten out of me the Capitol and its citizens still terrified me. Biting back my unease I fell back on my training and my whole body stiffened up into the position of attention, eyes locked forward, hands fisted at my sides, breath coming in with an even and measured rhythm. Just as I had been taught since stepping foot within the walls of this compound all those years ago.

A man I had seen for years on the large screens scattered around the district came to a stop in front of us. President Snow. His hand resting on his rounding belly and the stark whiteness of his beard a fitting match to the white rose pinned in his lapels. The irony was not lost on me with the match to his name but the fact was this man left me feeling anything but clean, as snow should. His breath came in short spikes as he spoke. "Candidates, it is with great honor I meet you today." His beady pale eyes sweeping around the room. "You are some of the most prepared men and women in the games history and I have no doubt one of you will make your district proud." When his eyes fell on me I couldn't decide if I wanted to run or move the few paces it would take to snap his neck. He bored his gaze into mine. "These games are a necessary part of our society and your district has continuously proven why you are the best. Why District 2 deserves the status given to it by the Capitol. You deserve it for you have made the Capitol proud." His voice seemed like the sickly sweet medication I was forced to take when I was young, being told it was helpful when in reality I wasn't sure it did anything. "I expect no less from any of you now." President Snow finished with a smile before turning to make his exit, his shoes clicking against the hard floor on his way out.

The final training week had finished and I was sitting in the back of the truck taking me out of the compound and home to my family. One week was given for a last visit to our families before the Reaping Day where I would volunteer myself for the 73rd Hunger Games to represent and bring honor to District 2. I was called to the Major's office shortly after President Snow's visit and told the officers had chosen me to volunteer. There were no niceties, no congratulations and I was simply dismissed to pack my rucksack for my trip home. The trip where I was currently slouched exhausted against the rough canvas seat, waiting to be dropped off at my front porch. Cato was staring aimlessly out the window, his already prominent jaw line even more defined as his whole body seemed to sit rigid on the edge of his seat, presenting a very different picture than what I was sure I was showing. My training tunic left most of my arms exposed and the dark patches scattered down my arms were very evident, I knew the rest of my torso looked the same. Hell, I felt battered not only physically but also emotionally. Here I was, seventeen years old and about to volunteer for the Hunger Games with the boy who sat across from me. The turbulent thoughts battered my mind and I shook my head to clear them, choosing to close my eyes until we arrived.

I was dropped off at my doorstep and told a pickup date and time by the driver before he sped away down towards Cato's home, I hadn't even bothered to say thank you or acknowledge I had heard the rendezvous information as I took in every piece of the building in front of me.

The navy blue paint on the door had begun to peel in places and the brass number plates were taking on a green border as they were beat by the weather. I had grown up in this house and I was soon going to be leaving it, maybe never to see it again so I made sure to take it all in as I would do with everything this week, I didn't want to forget anything.

* * *

It was the last night I was home, tomorrow I would be sitting on the black canvas backseat of the compound vehicle headed back for the reaping ceremony. I sat atop the building my family lived in, the cool evening breeze was soothing on my heated skin after the sticky summer day which was receding as quickly as the sun was falling from the crimson sky. We had eaten as a family, dinner was a surprisingly comfortable affair for having everyone together at the same table. We had talked, as much as we could during the meal but ignoring the big white elephant in the room was difficult and by the end of dinner I needed an escape. Coming up to the rooftop had been something I had done since I was very little, so much so it had become a habit and I often would find myself here without even realizing where my feet had brought me until the cool breeze was blowing across my face. It seemed rooftops, especially during the times when I could watch the sun travel across the sky, held somewhat of a magnetic pull for me. I leaned back against a railing edge and lazily watched the last golden rays before they vanished into the darkness and pale light from the stars. The hustle of the city below me was growing quieter as the citizens all returned from their jobs to the meager housing most of us had. I knew the stigma associated to the districts such as my own, most outsiders believed us to live a life similar to those of the Capitol but it was nothing like their imagined image. Everyone I knew had seen a child sent to the compound in order to provide more tessere, more rations for their family. We all suffered. District 2 was just better at hiding it than some. And even worse, too many had fallen under the ruse the Capitol fed us. Although, I couldn't tell if I was any better and I felt a sigh escape past my lips in frustration.

"You're getting predictable Curls." A voice came from behind me and I laughed as I turned to watch him walk towards me. Or saunter was more like it. Cato never walked anywhere, he was far too graceful for that and all of his movements no matter how mundane had a certain fighters edge to them, each seemingly calculated and with a sense of ease. His hair was catching some of the rays from the setting sun giving it the appearance of an ethereal glow about him. My stomach began tightening again as it had before when he was standing in his sweats at the squad bay and I pushed down the uninvited and poorly understood feelings. He knew I would be here tonight just as I knew he would follow me here, we often came to just escape and this rooftop was one of the few places we could out of the eyes of the Peacekeepers. Sometimes it scared me how well we knew each other but then again I wouldn't have wanted it any other way.

"As are you Smalls." I shot back and Cato laughed, our remarks were a usual greeting between us and welcomed as my unpredictable feelings were quelled as I fell into the familiar banter.

He walked to where I was sitting and gestured to the empty space next to me, "Is this taken by someone tonight?"

"As a matter of fact it is but I'm sure he'd get over it." I replied with a smirk.

"Never a dull moment with you, always have to have a smart comment don't you? Or would you rather I head back to my place and leave you to wait for your date tonight?" His hair was longer than I had seen it in a while, having grown in the week we were home and the fading sunlight made his eyes resemble an incoming storm. He almost seemed "normal", or as normal as someone could who was spending what could possibly be their final hours with their families. Being home made it harder for me to stop the flood of emotions I was now feeling, I just needed to hold out for a few more hours before getting back into the truck where I could return to the compound and leave the emotions at the gate. I laughed at my predicament and watched as he took a seat next to me.

***CATO***

Rachel's laugh was the only answer he needed and he sat down, exhaling as he hit the cool metal rooftop. "So what are you hiding from up here?"

She let out a breath he hadn't noticed she was holding. "I don't know Cato, just needed some space to think for a bit. This whole ordeal is overwhelming." Over the last week she had allowed herself to relax as he had and she ditched her usual workout clothing or cargo pants for more casual wear. What was most surprising to him was the fact she was in a dress, her hair was loose around her shoulders, and her bare feet which were barely visible beneath the hem, tucked next to her body.

"Did I suddenly grow horns or something?" She questioned, a light note to her voice. Dammit, he had been staring. Her smile was carried all the way up through her eyes as she laughed again.

"Just weird seeing you as someone other than a tribute, you actually look like a girl Rach." He mentally kicked himself for the stupid response and by the look on her face she had to agree with him on that observation. "You look different that's all, a nice different though."

"Thanks Cato. But I think we both look a bit different outside the compound, for one you need a haircut and a shave pretty bad." She reached up and tugged at some of the hair threatening to reach his eyebrows and he knew the stubble across his chin was just as an unusual sight. "Looking kinda scruffy there Smalls." He brushed her hand away as they shared a smile. "This week has been nice, weird but nice."

He knew exactly what she meant. They lived their whole life up to this point to prepare for the choosing ceremony but now that they were there it was as if they were looking down the face of a cliff with the only way down being to jump. His week however wasn't something he would classify as "nice", he tried spending time with his mother and he had truly enjoyed when she had her more lucid moments but mostly he spent the week at war with himself and the object of this internal war was the blonde seated next to him. They were told never to develop a friendship or any form of a relationship at all, most tributes found it difficult to maintain even a family relationship. Yet here he was, in the same condition he had been in for the past week, a position he very much did not enjoy being in.

Normally silence between them was comfortable, but tonight he felt suffocated while she sat unaffected, peacefully watching the contrast between blinking lights atop buildings and the stars appearing in the darkening sky. This was wrong. Everything he was feeling was wrong, coming here was wrong, sitting down next to her was wrong, and even more wrong was what he was thinking of doing. All he had to do was get up, climb down those stairs, go home, and wait for the truck to pick him up tomorrow but as simple as it seemed he was unable to make his body obey. Life was short, theirs even more so than most and even though what he was thinking of doing scared him he was more scared of having regrets. Few things in life scared Cato, but this was one of them and this one was a big complex clusterfuck. "This is fucked up." He groaned.

"What?" He hadn't realized he had vocalized his exasperation out loud.

"You don't want to know. For the both of us, trust me you don't want to know." He ran his hand through his hair pushing it back and resting his head on the railing behind him.

"Cato, you know saying that to me is only going to make me want to know even more. What is it? Seriously?" She turned and faced him, the wind causing her to tuck her hair behind her ears and pull her bare feet underneath the edge of her dress, her arms around her knees. It was strange, looking at this innocent picture of her before him now you would never know a week ago she was ruthlessly laying other candidates out on the training floor of the compound. Regardless of which she was, the woman next to him was always going to be a problem for him, unless he dealt with the problem. The problem was Cato had been trying since the first of those strange feelings came about a summer ago, to push them down and do the "right thing", she was professional and yet he couldn't be. He'd failed, if he was stronger he wouldn't be having this internal debate with himself, it shouldn't even be a question but it was.

"Do we need to get your hearing checked or your brain function before we go into the arena?" Her jovial tone was anything but how he felt about the current situation.

"This shouldn't be so hard." Again he caught himself with his hands in his hair as his frustration mounted. "I should be able to walk away. There are rules and if we're the best we are supposed to be the ones who follow the rules. Compartmentalize. The District before everything else." He knew he was going on without making much sense and she was probably confused, maybe she would think he was crazy and leave on her own.

"Cato, what are you going on about?" Concern was written all over her face and he put his head down so he wouldn't have to look at her. "Cato?" He looked up to see her sitting in front of him, blue eyes piercing his grey ones. "Talk to me."

"Answer for me the question I asked you weeks ago and I will." He was turning the tables in hopes of delaying actions he wouldn't be able to take back if his control slipped anymore.

She sighed, this time it was her who looked uncomfortable, he could tell by the way she looked away from him immediately. "I am just nervous about the games I suppose."

"That's it?" He pressed, knowing it had to be more complex than that, she wasn't telling him everything their years of friendship told him that much.

"What do you want me to say? Do you want me to break down? To say I'm scared? Conflicted? I want to do well, honor my family and our district, and to provide a better life for my mother and little sister. I can kill, we both know that. You and I are lethal, if we weren't they wouldn't have chosen us." She held his gaze again and continued, "But I can't kill you." Her expression softened and she dropped her head to her hands, blonde curls getting caught between the same fingers deft at navigating knots and weapons alike.

His resolve shattered. "Damn it Rachel." She had to say what she did, he almost wished he hadn't pushed her to reveal what she had.

***RACHEL***

Something was wrong. Cato was always so sure of himself. He was a rock I was able to rely on when I needed one and here he was crumbling in front of me. "You said you'd tell me if I told you." Maybe pressing him wasn't the right move but I knew he'd dodge the topic if I didn't and keeping it inside of him was killing him.

"I did say that didn't I?" He looked tired. "I told you earlier I wouldn't be able to kill you."

"Its more than that though." I continued because I knew him better than that.

***CATO***

"Yeah it's more than that.." He paused. "Fuck"

"Cato..." She pulled his face up, forcing him to look at her, quite possibly the one thing he didn't want to or couldn't do. Her eyes told him she already knew, she had that uncanny ability to do that - knew him well enough it scared him.

"Fuck it." Her hand still rested on his cheek and he brought his larger one up to pull her own down in front of them, his fingers wove between hers and he watched his thumb brush across the top her hand. He felt her breath across his face and when he looked up her blue eyes were searching his grey ones. She had to know what he was going to do, she always did. He had one last chance to back up and stop all this and a small part of him was urging him to do just that but he roughly shut it out before he closed the final inches between them and throwing caution to the wind he kissed her. Cato stopped thinking for those few moments and simply let himself enjoy the stolen time he would never experience again.


End file.
